Put yourself first, put yourself before your drinking and join me on a 7 day sober retreat – A New Stop Drinking Course.
I have learned a lot since I stopped drinking on March 28th 2018, but perhaps the most important lesson of all is to put myself first.
There is a fabulous quote which I turn to when I feel myself letting things slip and when, you know, life starts to get crazy: “Put yourself at the top of your to-do list every single day and the rest will fall into place.” I don’t know who wrote it but, they certainly have the right idea.
So often, as women, as mums, we tend to put ourselves last because we’re so busy running around after other people and just doing stuff. It seems like we forget about us, about our needs, about our desire to take a load off from time to time and the importance of really looking after ourselves.
We do this even more so when we drink, thanks to the ‘Mummy Needs Wine Culture’ we’re told that we have to just soldier on no matter what and the only way to get through it is to self medicate with regular doses of wine. Oh, my God! I was as guilty as the next mum to read into that narrative and take the advice – literally.
Even worse, is that when I did succumb and listen to my body and decide I needed a long soak in the bath or a break from the kids to catch up with a friend, I felt guilty. This shame and guilt is what keeps us trapped for so long, afraid to reach out, afraid to listen to ourselves and just take a break.
It is far easier to justify regularly imbibing wine than it is to take the afternoon off and go for a walk, or spend an hour curled up with a book and that my friends, is why I created the 7 day sober retreat just for you.
Join me on the stop drinking sober retreat
Now, ideally I would love to do this retreat in person with you, deep in the beautiful Spanish countryside with beaches to walk along, woodland to wander in and gorgeous open spaces in which to reconnect and gain perspective. Perhaps I will run such an experience in real life one day.
For now though, I want you to join me on a virtual retreat. Think of it as an opportunity to unplug from the outside world, for 20 minutes a day, for seven days. To give yourself a break, some space from your drinking, take a step back and breathe. All you need it some quiet time, a cup of tea and perhaps your journal.
The beauty of the Virtual Sober Retreat is that you can keep coming back to it, again and again, whenever you feel the need to reconnect with yourself again and show yourself the love and compassion you deserve. The retreat runs in our private Facebook group, Blissfully Sober every month with the dawn of the new moon. There is no better time to take a step back, to release and let go of what is no longer serving you. Ask yourself, “What do I really need right now?”
I have been running the retreat now, for three months and women love this opportunity to put themselves first, listen to their bodies and nourish their soul. Many of the women who have done the retreat with me used it as a place to begin their sober journey and are still alcohol free!
Every day, there is a beautiful inspiring quote to begin with which you can take with you throughout your day, a short lesson to read and then an exercise for you to do which will help you understand that you do deserve to be put first, you are worthy of some proper me time and that you do need regular self care.
The aim of the Virtual Sober Retreat is to learn how to put yourself before your drinking, to listen to your body, your heart and reconnect with yourself. And, not feel guilty about it. Self care is not a luxury, it is a necessity. It is also more than just having our nails done or getting a foot massage once in a blue moon.
One thing I discovered when I stopped drinking was that I had no idea how to care for myself properly! I mean, not the basics like remembering to wash, but I had forgotten how I liked to unwind, what really brought me joy, how to cope with all of the feelings that kept bubbling up, or how to set myself up for the day – I didn’t know how to do any of it, so I spent the first few months on the sofa every evening with chocolate and DVD’s.
I have since, of course, rediscovered what I truly love to do, what I need to do to keep me on track, how to cope when unexpected feelings wash over me and how to set a positive intention for my day. I have discovered yoga, meditation and journalling, all of which have been essential in helping me on my sober journey.
I believe that by doing some inner work before we quit drinking, by getting to know ourselves better, we see that there really is no space for alcohol in our lives
I wish that I had had these tools before I stopped drinking. So often when we decide to stop drinking, we think it’s enough to just remove the alcohol – it isn’t. True happiness in sobriety comes from self care and self discovery but we seem to stumble upon this by accident, almost like an afterthought which can make the journey so much harder than it needs to be.
I believe that by doing some inner work before we quit drinking, by getting to know ourselves better, we see that there really is no space for alcohol in our lives and we can create an alcohol free life that we love. All it takes is some self awareness, self discovery and a generous dose of self love and self care.
Are you ready for some extreme self care? Are you ready to reconnect and show yourself the love and respect you deserve? Are you ready to put yourself first?
Join me for seven beautiful days and learn how to put yourself before your drinking.
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